The New Dork – Entrepreneur State of Mind

I think this video speaks for itself….

What’s The Value In Having 5,000 Friends?

Let me ask you all (ya’ll) a question – how many friends do you have on Facebook? How many of those people are actual friends that you know, care about “what’s on their mind”, and want to converse with? How about Twitter? Do you strive to have more followers? Do you follow everyone who follows you? How often do you get to read all the tweets in your Twitterstream?

We’ve created a monster.

Inspired by an article in the latest issued of Wired he read on the flight to LA this week, our friend Tyler just announced he had cut his Facebook friends list back from more than 2,000 to around 300 total. The article, by Clive Thompson (In Praise of Online Obscurity), analyzes the way we have turned social networking into something very unsocial. No longer are we using social networking as a means of fostering relationships with people we actually care about – we’re using it to create new relationships with people (and “reconnect” with people from our past) and quite frankly, we can’t keep up with it. We’re faced with countless hurdles to jump to maintain these relationships, weeding through updates from networking contacts we barely know, distant friends from our childhood, friends of friends and ex-boyfriends. All people who, the second you click accept, can see all your info, as well. As Thompson points out, when your list gets too big, social networking is no longer a possibility. Social networking starts to break down.

Nowadays, people use Facebook as a means to notifying their friends about developments in their life (and granted, some stuff we could care less about – “Makin’ quesadillas tonight!” – I’m guilty of that.) In the last week I found out that I missed news from two of my good friends because their updates were lost in my enormous feed. One of my friends adopted a rescue puppy and the other one got engaged. Both are things I actually would have liked to know, but because of all the noise in my feed, I didn’t.

So what was the result of Tyler’s massacre on his friends list? A list of status updates that he – SHOCK! – actually cares about. Imagine truly wanting to read each and every status update on your list, instead of clicking “Hide” on that person you added, but only because you had 30 friends in common, all of whom are people you met at conferences. Imagine not having to worry that you’re missing something important, funny or interesting because your feed is filled with information and people that honestly, you could care less about.

Of course, this is just my opinion.

Thompson emphasizes the value in obscurity – of keeping your network small and manageable, because once it grows to a certain size, the conversation dissipates. It becomes silent. Mark Zuckerberg famously declared at the recent Crunchie Awards that living publicly and having minimal online privacy is “the social norm, now.” I disagree. Living a public life is not something everyone should be obligated to do, just because they want to use social networking to keep in touch with friends. Now, online privacy is an entirely separate issue as far as I’m concerned (albeit a very, very important one, I have quite a bit to say about this what with having my identity stolen online several times). But aside from the security aspect, I can’t help but agree with Thompson’s stance on online obscurity – how on Earth are we expected to keep up genuine relationships with 3,000 of our closest friends? It’s just not possible. Not unless you give up your job, your family, your hobbies, eating and sleeping. And then what would you have left to talk about, anyway?

In a way, it’s just like high school again – one big popularity contest. So many people striving to be the next Gary Vaynerchuk, the next “online celeb” who millions turn to for entertainment and advice. First of all, this isn’t realistic. That kind of fame is just not feasible for most of us. And whatever happened to good old human relationships – conversations – not soapboxing?

I’m not suggesting everyone go on an “unfriend-ing” rampage or to stop trying to gain followers, I suppose it depends on the purpose of that particular network, but I do think that if you plan on using social networking as a tool to strengthening relationships, you might want to scale back or segregate your relationships by dividing them on different networks (LinkedIn, for example). I know many are of the opinion that in order to create a successful business relationship, you have to first start with a personal relationship, and to some extent, I agree. But you’ve got to make it genuine. Adding me as one of your 7,000 friends on Facebook does not make me feel like I am getting in a close, personal, trusting relationship with you to where I would ever want to enter a business partnership with you. The same way I would feel if I were one of 300 people invited to your birthday party and only had 5 minutes to celebrate with you.

By the way – I realize this might sound a bit hypocritical because I have this blog and a handful of fans, but in no way do I tout myself as a “guru” of any kind or someone that people should “turn to for advice.” I’m nobody. Just a random girl with a poorly written, stream-of-conscience blog and a need to share pretty, interesting things. I have no goals in terms of popularity or fame. This concept of scaling back on social networking just resonated with me, perhaps because of my own struggle to maintain intimate relationships these days via social networking. So – I ask of you…

What’s your method when it comes to managing your online social scene? Do you have rules for adding new friends? Do you only use certain networks for certain things? I’m very curious to find out!

Have You Voted For The 2010 Bloggies?

Another day, another award to vote for. Not that I would ever be nominated for one, so don’t get too excited. This time, it’s the 2010 Bloggies – perhaps one of the biggest and most coveted blog awards. With the ever-growing blogosphere, the competition is tough, and the nominees this year are more than deserving.

I just went and cast my votes, and now it’s your turn.

Here are a few of the folks that earned my votes, many of which I read on a daily basis. Even if you don’t vote for them, I highly suggest reading up on their blogs! Each is fantastic and a perfect solution to wandering internet-eye-syndrome!

• The Pioneer Woman

• Bakerella
• Cupcakes and Cashmere sidenote: I met Miss Emily at an LA women-blogger meetup last year and she is FAB!
• PostSecret
• CakeWrecks
• Sea of Shoes
• Stereogum
• Apartment Therapy
• Regretsy
• Confessions of a Young Married Couple

Happy voting, and may the best and most humble bloggers win!

Florence & The Machine Totally Heart Me

What are Florence & The Machine doing with a polaroid photo of ME in their video?

Find out here. Thanks to Seany for sharing!

Bits ‘n Pieces: January 9, 2010

I wrote 2009 in the title of this, I still can’t believe it’s 2010. Where’s my flying car? So, I haven’t done one of my ‘Bits ‘n Pieces’ thingamajigs since before Christmas, therefore many of these items are old, but – who cares. Many of them warrant their very own blog posts, but I don’t have time for that right now, so you get a list. Love ya!

One of the images in my ‘Wedding Inspiration’ folder. From 100 Layer Cake.
Seriously cute wedding pics from a NYE eloping!

Up The Lacquer: I want these limited-edition Chanel nailpolishes. Can you imagine the hours of painting-and-picking fun I could have with them?! What cute colors.

What Is Yoga, Really?: A piece from a GOOD community member. Pretty interesting background on yoga… he also references a book, The Yoga of Jesus that I want to check out. Man, I really need to start doing yoga again. Just thinking about it makes me more aware of my tense upper back.

loveyourchaos

An “UnFit” Kitchen Fit For Christmas: I want this to be my kitchen. So homey, so cozy, so warm!

The Poetry Clock: I don’t know how it works (I guess it lights up certain words to let you know what time it is), and it really doesn’t seem efficient, but this poetry clock sure is purdy!

Non-toxic nail polish: I don’t even want to think about the amount of chemicals I’ve ingested over the years while using my teeth to peel nail polish off my fingernails. This is a great idea. Thanks to my friend Sarah, who is aware of my issues with nail polish peeling, for sending this my way!

le love

The Real Life Simpson’s House:

Things I Love Thursday

Oh my, am I ever in a frenzy. I leave on a week-long trip to Nashville and Virginia on Saturday morning, and have been driving myself up the wall with work- and home-related tasks in preparation. It’ll be worth it though, as it is not only the first time the Julian Monster will be meeting my wonderfully delicious family, but it will be the very first time I’ll have headed back to Virginia for Thanksgiving since I made my move to LA three and a half years ago! My how the time flies. I presume all the leaves will have fallen by then, but I’m excited about being in my home state during fall nonetheless.

amaliachimera

I didn’t have a ton of time to prepare this week, so pardon me if it’s not up to your expectations… to make up for it, I promise a week of blogging updates from home – with photos, since Julian is teaching me how to use his uber-fancy camera!

THINGS I LOVE THURSDAY!

- Six month anniversary celebrations. Gigantic hot pink and red peonies. Yellow Mary Janes. Shiny gold and pink belt. My (and his) favorite perfume. Pink cards with sweet messages on them. Deeeelicious food. Banana creme pie. A Christmas Carol in 3D with jingle bells on our wrists. Fake snow. A handsome man by my side. Our six month anniversary was a dream come true, as is the rest of our time together… *blush*

- The Pioneer Woman. I can’t believe I have been living this long without The Pioneer Woman in my life. I’ve brushed elbows with her by making her apple tart (which we devoured in its entirety in a single night), but I chalked it up to just another recipe blog and that was that. Boy was I wrong! I’ve spent literally hours reading her hilarious and detailed accounts of transitioning from life as a “black heel wearing city girl” to that of the rancher wife of a cowboy in the Mid West. The woman can write, not to mention, cook. I’d say she’s after my own heart. DEFINITELY a new favorite blog of mine. The cherry on top is that she’s got a new cookbook out, something I simply MUST add to my collection.

- Irregular Choice shoes. These aren’t your average run-of-the-mill pumps and wedges. They’re colorful, wacky, and cleverly themed shoes that will make your heart go thump-thump and your wallet go empty. Not that I would actually consider wearing these (I promise), but the Miaow shoe below is an wonderful example of what you can find at this UK-based shoe shop.

- Baby Red Pandas playing… Tarantino-style. Best animals EVAR!

- The first part of the 09 Holiday Buyer’s Guide being published. Do I look hilarious, or do I look hilarious?

- Speaking on the panel for Girls in Tech LA event “The Impact of Tech on Good & Green” – and not totally bombing. I was so nervous, as it was only my second time ever speaking on a panel, but if you know me, you know I love to talk – so I had no problem babbling about using social media tools for good, and apparently I made sense! Plus, I met so many awesome women who are making a difference in the world! My fellow panelists, and moderator Siel of GreenLAGirl.com, are amazing and definitely worth checking out: Sandra at orGLAMic.com and Tracy from YourDailyThread.com.

- Now this is something I can get behind. www.catsforgold.com

- Hearing Julian tell Scout how much he loves her and that she is the first cat he’s ever loved. And seeing the look on her face when he’s holding her. SO cute. Buddies.

- Advance Christmas preparations. I’ve hung Christmas light on my balcony, downloaded a classical Christmas album, and already began making my Christmas gifts. A month and a half before December 25, and I’m already off to a good start for my favorite holiday!

photo: emesheartsphotos

And with that, I must leave you. I have much to do before we take off on our Thanksgiving excursion… see you later!

xoxo

Trick or Treat for Charity with SocialVibe’s Click 4 Good

This blog originally posted by moi on The Vibe, Girls In Tech and bub.blicio.us.

Sleepy Hollow’s annual Pumpkin Blaze

Are you ready for Halloween yet? We sure are, and this year, it’s time to take the focus away from cavity-creating candy and onto doing good around the world. Today, SocialVibe launched a new program called Click 4 Good, a virtual neighborhood of haunted houses where you can go trick or treating to benefit charity.

For each spooktacular door you knock on, you’ll be greeted not by a ghost or goblin, but by a donation that will be made to one of these incredibly worthy non-profits:

- Stand Up 2 Cancer: Aims to urgently move cancer research forward by advancing technology available to scientists and clinicians.
- charity: water: Provides clean, safe drinking water to people in developing nations.
- The Surfrider Foundation: Dedicated to protecting and preserving our world’s oceans, waves and beaches.
- Keep a Child Alive: Provides life-saving anti-retroviral treatment, care and support to children and families whose lives have been affected by HIV/AIDS in Africa and India.

Each visit yields a specific impact, such as 18 gallons of water for people in need through charity: water or 1 hour of HIV/AIDS treatment for a child through KCA. After you earn your impact, you’ll have the opportunity to share it on Twitter or Facebook, encouraging your friends to do the same. Each time that friend goes trick or treating, the impact grows. This has amazing potential to create enormous positive social impact around the world.

Take advantage of your time online and get some trick or treating practice in a little early this year by visiting SocialVibe’s haunted house neighborhood at socialvibe.com/click4good.

Things I Love Thursday

Happy Thursday! Only one more day til the weekend. Use today to reflect on the awesome things in your life that many people in the world aren’t able to enjoy, like having a loving family and/or friends, a warm bed to sleep in at night, food in your belly and a God that loves you no matter what (whether or not you choose to believe it). Let go of your stress and meditate on the positive… you’d be surprised at how much it lifts your mood!

Fall in Love by MelissaT

Here’s my list for Things I Love Thursday.

- Long, inspirational drives from Vegas that spawn positive changes and very bright futures.

- The Oil Cleansing Method. Putting this on my weekly list of loves is a wee bit premature, but I’m just so confident that it will be amazing, I’m including it anyway. Read my post on it here.

- Candy shops. We visited one at The Mirage prior to taking in LOVE, the Beatles themed Cirque de Soleil show (which was AMAZING, thank you, Jess!), and it was sickeningly fabulous! I have a major sweet tooth so having that much sugar in one place was truly heaven. I ate it all the way back to LA, too.

photo: surlygrrrl

- New babies. Congratulations to Chris and Kelly, who welcomed their son Dylan into the world very early last Friday!

- Holiday scented bubble bath from Philosophy, one of my favorite body care lines. Picked up some “Peace on Earth” this weekend and used it in my super fancy hotel room at the Trump (that cost way less thanks to Priceline). Mmmm!

- Bill Cosby. One of the funniest (and family-friendly) comedians EVAR. My friend Evan (@YourFriendEvan on Twitter) is heading up The Cos’ social media campaign, which includes profiles on nearly all the popular sites, including Twitter (@BillCosby), and one very special Facebook app, where you can dress yourself in a snazzy sweater and choose an audio clip from Bill to accompany your look. Mine below.

- NYLON Magazine blog publishing the Tag! I submitted. They changed my name for privacy reasons, but they did link to the SocialVibe blog, which rocks!

Personally, I liked my title, “A-bee-ham Lincoln” better.

Green technology. Chipotle installed solar panels in 75 of their restaurants, not only cementing their place in my heart, but securing their rank as the #1 producer of solar power in the industry. This is one of the many reasons I love this socially aware and eco-friendly company! San Francisco also became the first city in the nation to require residents to recycle and compost, banning food waste from trash. Residents have to pay up to $500 fine per incident. The first day of the law’s implementation was yesterday, and the city saw an increase of 100 tons in compost pick-ups. Sa-weet!

- Dresses made entirely out of pink breast cancer awareness ribbons. A little skanky, but it’s for a good cause. (P.S. Save some boobs.)

- Motivated teens who want to set world records by sailing around the world in a pink sailboat. You go, girl!

- Finishing another book (Francis Chan’s Crazy Love). So what if it was an audiobook? I finished! I only have about 15 more to go before I’m allowed to buy another book (I have a serious problem with buying books before I’ve read the ones I already own… and borrowing books for months/years without reading them, oopsies!)

- Cool photographs of light. See more of Alan Jaras’ work here.

- Connecting with a really cool LA-based non-profit while at BlogWorld. They do some really cool after-school programs with elementary school kids and I’m currently talking to them about ways that I can get involved. So exciting!

- Jeans that fit really, really well and cost less than $30 (thank you, Forever 21!)

On another note, what is up with the lack of Halloween spirit this year? No one has any plans for Halloween, which is on a SATURDAY I might add, the perfect night for a party, and I’ve hardly seen any decorations. It’s only a week away, people! What are you being for Halloween? I’ve got a really cute/funny/clever costume in mind for myself and the J-Monster. You’ll seeeee!

Things I Love Thursday

It’s Thursday in most of the world already so I’m going to post this early… because, well, because I feel like it.

This is going to be a quick one, but only because I have to wake up at like insane o’clock tomorrow morning to catch a plane to Las Vegas. I’m going to BlogWorld Expo with my coworker David, who is speaking on a panel about Tools & Tips for Non-Profits in Social Media (hint: SocialVibe is one of them). I’m really looking forward to checking out all the other amazing panels and watching the keynote speakers. Oh yes, and the after hours events… always a fun time with the social media and tech crowd. Last year was pretty fun but this year will be even better, because Julian is coming up on Friday (he has friends in town) and we’re going to see LOVE, The Beatles themed Cirque de Soleil show with his (newly engaged) friends Clint & Katie on Saturday night. Then, we’re going to meet and hang with his other friend Michael at a church in Henderson on Sunday. It’s going to be a whirlwind of a time but I’m super excited…

…except for the waking up at 4am tomorrow morning part. On that note, let’s get started.

Things I Love Thursday:

• Bookstores. If I had to choose another profession, I would totally work in a bookstore, or own my own, like the girl in You’ve Got Mail. Not only because of the sick discount (I LOVE reading), but because it would give me a chance to chat with fellow book-lovers and swap recommendations. Seeing all the new titles as they come in wouldn’t be so bad, either. I could browse a bookstore for hours.
• RAIN!!!! LA is currently experiencing its first rain of the season. I come from a place where it rains almost year round, and though it can be quite annoying having to run to your car and getting your shoes all wet, there is something extremely calming and cozy about the rain. I really love being in the car while it’s raining… and cuddling in bed while it’s raining. Out here in Southern California, our winters consist of 50 degree weather and rain…. sometimes. Because of the recent wildfires, this downpour is even more welcomed than usual.
  
  Rain? Smog? Whatever, it looks cool.
  

• Free Sunglasses for Breast Cancer Awareness Month! PRVCY Premium is probably going to hate me because I have broadcast their free sunglasses offer out to just about everyone I know (and wrote about it on The Vibe), but hey – FREE SUNGLASSES EVERYBODY!!!
• I don’t love PLAYBOY, but I do love that the magazine has chosen Marge Simpson as their cover girl for this month. Marge is keeping it somewhat classy in this three-page spread though, not bearing any real skin and keeping her cartoon lingerie on. The Simpsons are forever awesome.
  

• Vegas! BlogWorld! I can’t stand the city for more than a few days at a time, but whenever I am in Sin City, it’s usually a lot of fun. The lights, the people, the sounds, the shopping, the food – there is truly no place on Earth like it. I remember visiting my Grandparents in (very Northern) Scotland a few years back and talking to their elderly friends about time they spent in the US. They said Las Vegas was their favorite. What is it with old people and Vegas?
• itmademyday.com. Another meme site, but this one is pretty positive (most of the time) and made me LOL several times today.
• Random, cute texts from my boyfriend. Oh, and laughing my face off with him. No one – and I mean NO ONE – makes me laugh as much as he does… that must be why I love him so very much. ♥ Plus he’s SO handsome! And sweet/talented/compassionate/tall/smart/driven, etc! So let’s just make this whole “Thing I Love” Julian as a person.
• The smell of chimneys. I LOVE having a wood burning fireplace. All my neighbors are burning fires because it has all the sudden dropped about 10 degrees in temp… I love the smell.
• Hiking the really hard side of Runyon Canyon and making it. I seriously thought I might pass out and meet my maker at many a moment on the side of that mountain, but I pushed through thanks to Heather and I felt awesome afterward. Note: this was Saturday morning and my butt is still sore. Good workout, I’d say.
• Organic Lavender Chamomile tea, because it tastes like heaven on Earth and makes me feel all warm and fuzzy and makes me sleepy without the use of icky drugs. My favorite is drinking it while reading in bed until I fall asleep. Traditional Medicinals is ‘da bomb.’
• Learning about the 10 plagues and Moses at church on Sunday. Very fascinating, I had no idea that each of the 10 plagues was directly related to a specific god the Egyptians worshiped at that time (i.e., the frog plague & Heket, the female god of Frogs). I suppose this was God’s way of showing them that there is only one true God.
  
  Ribbit.
  

• Potential spring trips to Berlin… fingers crossed!
• Patrick Smith Photography – this dude knows how to take a picture. His landscape shots are seriously jaw-dropping and perfect for desktop wallpapers (especially when you work on your laptop all day and can only dream about spending the day at one of these incredible locations)
  

  

  

  

  
  

  And on that note we’re going to wrap this up, because I’ve got some lavender tea drinking to do so I can get nice & sleepy …. and then wake up at 4am to drive to the airport! >:O

  
  
  
  What are you loving this fine Thursday?
  • 

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Things I Love Thursday + IOWAtasmic

Technically, it is still Thursday, so I don’t feel too bad about posting this super late, let alone this being my first post in DAYS. But I have been busy; between birthday celebrations, apartment hunting with the boyfriend, first home group of the year and traveling, I haven’t had much time to do anything else.

I’m currently in beautiful and fascinating Mt. Pleasant, Iowa for @IOWAtasmic, the first and only social media tech conference in Iowa. It is beyond my wildest dreams. We were a bit unsure about what to expect, as most conferences I attend are in larger cities like Los Angeles, Austin, SF, Vegas, etc. I have to tell you, it is quite charming, and I haven’t seen a single cornfield yet. I have met some really faboosh people here, among them @YourFriendEvan, @iwearyourshirt, @TheDerekJohnson, @ozsultan, @db, @swiftkaratechop and of course I am here with my girlfriends @JuliaGardner, @brette and @hdunce. Today we got a tour of the local college campus where the conference is taking place, Iowa Wesleyan College.

Mt. Pleasant it is much prettier than I anticipated.

After that, we ate lunch at Paul Revere’s pizza, which is home to the 2nd biggest pizza in the world. I’m not kidding, the thing was huge. One could use it as a blanket. After our feast and attempting to get some work done at the hotel for a few hours, it was back to the campus for the opening ceremonies, where Derek Johnson gave an awesome speech about his entrepreneurial journey from being a college drop-out to becoming the 24-yr-old founder of Tatango, a company that facilitates mass-SMSing for small businesses, churches, sororities and other groups. His story was pretty phenomenal, though he and I disagree on his tactic of sharing his personal phone number with any and all who want it, including publishing it in the Wall Street Journal. Considering I’m here speaking about E-Stalkers and Protecting Your Online Privacy (my online-identity-taker “Ferarro” should enjoy that), that is no surprise.

We met an adorable college-aged attendee and social media lover, @mmmorganj, who drove hours to see us speak all by herself, it was quite cute. Then we all headed back to Keo’s for dinner followed by a surprise cake for my birthday (which is today, thank you very much, I’m 27!). Big thanks to @BradmanTV for remembering and hooking it up. They sang Happy Birthday to me THREE times, which I’m guessing was practice for the next event, KARAOKE IN THE PARK. One cannot describe the magnificent-ness that was Karaoke in Central Park, so I recorded a video for you so that each and every one of you can enjoy it for yourselves.

I’m hoping to catch a few of the many great sessions happening tomorrow in between my own presentation and our Women in the Web panel, but I’m sure the real magic will happen after hours, though the girls and I might just sneak off to catch Julie & Julia at the cute cinema in town. I’ll be sure to update accordingly.

I fly back to LA on Sunday night, but am only there for less than a day before I fly back out to San Francisco for Social Media Strategies with some of the SocialVibe crew. I think this will be the last of my travels for at LEAST a month.

So without further ado, here are this week’s THINGS I LOVE THURSDAY!

Super Mario nails, which are cool enough to ignore the 1.5″ nails; spending time with people who rock in a town the size of my high school, writing to-do lists and checking stuff off (I’m such a list-maker); birthday love on Facebook, with e-gifts such as this Hello Kitty accessory kit for cats (thanks, Lauren!);

apartment hunting with the BF and realizing how lucky I am to have found a great place to call home (P.S. he found a GREAT one just a few blocks away!); having the first home group through Ecclesia and already meeting awesome guys and gals; cats who lay on their back and let you rub your feet on their tummy, surprise birthday parties with massive amounts of cupcakes and love (pics coming soon); Gossip Girl FINALLY returning to television, hello #fangirl!; gifts from Mom in the form of a bicycle; mastering the art of packing to where it takes me less than an hour; bright blue ribbon headbands, friendly squirrels; being in the presence of smart, creative and motivated people; text messaging with my Grandma.

That’s all for now, as I am absolutely pooped and must catch some zzzz’s or the folks who have signed up for my session will be wondering why they paid to see a 27 yr-old blonde girl asleep at a podium. Ta-ta!

Heather, Brette and Julia in downtown Mt. Pleasant.